The Story of the past Lives...

 They came from the same doorway...

With very similar lessons to work on. 

No matter how much she wanted to use her power 

to push him away out of fears, The more she realized that 

it was all a circle... 

It reminded her of that song, Circle in the sand

 by Belinda Carlisle...

The part that went something like...

Oh baby, anywhere you go
We are bound together
I begin, baby, where you end
Some things are forever

Circle in the sand
Round and round
Never ending love is what we've found
And you complete the heart of me
Our love is all we need
Circle in the sand

She knew she was a hopeless romantic and 

that it got her in trouble more times then she liked to admit.

Who was she kidding...

Her illusion delusions always sucked her into an endless vortex

known as the abyss of false thinking...

But this time... she was really trying to figure things out 

from another perspective.

She knew she wasn't going to jump. 

But she was definitely enjoying the puzzle. 

The piece she had recently acquired was indeed 

something of new found interest.

She was new to chart reading, but it definitely sparked her interest.

And as she looked over their charts, she saw that they were indeed

of a similar walk in life.

She wondered if they choose this walk together. 

To perhaps help each other out and up?

It didn't matter much to her how that was going to happen..

Since it had pretty much already happened since the day they met. 

It was one domino crash after another with them, but yet, 

in the end, they each picked up a new piece and kept going.

So it wasn't as bad as it seemed on the planet, cuz in the 

collective sense, they were actually really helping each other 

get better and grow in the knowledge that they both came here for.

And for that she was truly grateful.

She really hadn't figured it all out just yet... 

But she was getting closer.

She knew that much.

She wondered if he knew the things she knew though? 

Or  maybe she was opening it up in him slowly and that's why 

they chose to come together in this lifetime.... 

And then maybe she was just dreaming again.

It was well known that

A Pisces loved the well thought out fantasy story..

Especially when she was the narrator of it

The BroKeN Chase...

 Today was an interesting day for her.. 

The energies were pretty intense all day and as much as 

she didn't want to admit it, they did kind of stir her

quite a bit. 

But little did she know, there was a diamond in the rough

waiting to be had as long as she followed her heart! 

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It all began earlier that day as she was  on her way to visit

her mother. She came upon a red light and  

at the light, on the corner, was a guy with a sign in his hand.

She looked over at her purse and remembered that she didn't

have any cash on hand. Only cards. 

She looked in her car for any loose change but 

there was none lying around as per usual. 

She sighed.... 

then looked up at the guy and gave him that

 defeated shoulder shrug...

He waved a friendly hi to her and then smiled. 

Shocked at his kindness, she waved back and gave him a smile.

He then took his hand and pointed upward to the sky and Nodded.

She burst into tears!

She didn't know why. She just did...

It was almost like something inside her burst open the flood gates

 and the tears just began streaming down her face. 

The light turned Green and she took her turn... 

Then right in front of her, a gathering of crows 

flew in a circle and then to the left.

 She smiled and somehow knew, 

that everything was going to be 

all Right. 

She loved how life always had something new to show her.

Like later that evening, on her way back home. 

She drove over a bridge and not even a minute later, 

a car comes flying by her! 

It went by so fast that her car shook with the passing wind.

Then a few seconds later, a cop car comes flying past her. 

And then another... and another!

This was really getting exciting for her!

She watched the speeding car swerve around all the other cars in front of it... 

and the cops chasing him the same way.. 

She let her mind try to explore what was happening..

Did he do something bad? or was he just being stupid and trying to 

get away from a speeding ticket? 

Was it a hit and run?

Or maybe a drug deal gone wrong?

Then just as she pulls up to a red light, 

The same car comes rushing back in the other lane to her left! 

She sees the cops still chasing him! 

She wondered.. "How in the hell have they not caught him yet? 

Honestly?" 

But then she went on to wonder, how did he even make a U-turn 

so quickly without crashing or getting caught? 

"He must have been a professional", she thought to herself.

Then the light turned green

and the fun was over. 

But she got the message loud and clear...

And she thanked God for the Wisdom! 

To know Nothing is to know everything..

Starting over again...  

again and again... 

She was always back there...

Only this time, she was ready to begin differently.

This time, she knew who she was. 

She knew her value.

She knew her price. 

And the most important thing, 

was she knew what Love was. 

And what Love was not.

The light and dark were very clear to her.

She knew both.

Pain and joy.

Struggle and Flow.

Fear and Love.

Heaven and Hell.

She finally knew them all.

And with all this knowing, 

She was now ready to face 

the unknown!

But what was the Unknown? 

It was Her. 

Who she truly was.

That one truth that she had kept hidden from all the world.

That one part of her that everyone was always after. 

That one part of her that they all wanted to know and experience, 

yet didn't have the correct key to unlock.

That unknown part of her that had at long last come to bloom... 

And she was finally ready to let it intertwine with

the laws of attraction

 so that they could carry her forth on her journey

 once again.

 

Lies that don't hide are unbelievable truths...

 Words... 

Words were her thing. 

She loved to compile words of all sorts 

and just wanted to make a flowing river of 

every word that ever came out of her.

Life was a poem yearning to be written. 

By her!

By writers!

By Artists!

By Poets!

The world was a stage and the words painted 

the story each character played here on Earth. 

All was beautiful in her eyes...

Even the villains.

They had their roles too. 

However, she really did not like the dark words that came out 

of such characters. 

Words that were meant to degrade. 

Belittle.

Disrespect. 

Those kinds of words did not match her vibration,. 

She realized that the more she saw and read those kinds 

of low vibration words, the more she wanted to 

completely turn away from those type of characters.

Even the one character whom she wanted to believe 

was meant to be the hero in her story. 

Yet, she realized that if he really was meant to be in her story, 

he would be in it because their vibration would match.

Like a

And the very fact that he kept his vibration so low with 

disrespectful thinking, words, and slanders...

It told her it was all just a dream that lived only in her imagination. 

A wolf in sheep's clothing is definitely what she saw. 

But then she realized.. He wasn't even in sheep's clothing. 

He was in clear view. 

No lies. 

Just Plain truth. 

He was a Wolf. 

It was no secret. 

And she wasn't blind. She had eyes. 

She saw him exactly as he was in the here and now 

and she acknowledged it. 

She didn't like it, but she acknowledged it, finally.

And so she went back to her own story. 

The one with fairies 

and unicorns 

and a cat...

A little black cat with a magical hat... 

And she continued to write happy endings,

 because that is what she wanted always.

A Happily Ever After. 

Be free with me...

 And there she was again. 

Back to square one. 

Back to that same starting place. 

She was getting so tired of this circle.

This cycle.

She didn't want to do it all over again.

And she made a vow to herself that no.. 

This time. 

She wasn't going to do it.

Any of it. 

She was done.

That road that she used to travel was

washed away by the flood of tears she had cried and cried.

That bridge connecting her to that same washed away

road had also caught fire and burned to the ground,

along with any other manipulative tactic her mind

had held onto for so many years!

As she sat at the table,

she tried hard not to let defeat take her hand

She didn't feel at one with defeat.

She wasn't defeated.

She knew that much.

Instead she felt that she had actually won,

because she had finally let go of all that 

never worked for her.

She was always selling herself short. 

She had much more to offer in this life then just 

the basic simple things she allowed herself to get 

carried away in. 

The New Moon in Sagittarius was coming up.

Jupiter was about to station direct...

And Thanksgiving was happening the day right after

all these glorious new beginnings where pulling in 

to happen. 

These were the hands that she wanted to grab.

They were the direction in which she really wanted 

to go next.

But before she could finally turn and take that first 

step forward...

She realized there was something still up in the air that 

she was afraid to address. 

Maybe she didn't want to admit that if she did finally 

address it, that it would no longer be... 

But reality was that it no longer was anymore anyways. 

And maybe it never even was before and it was all just her 

illusion delusion. 

But she decided that she was ready, finally. 

That she was going to really face it. 

-----------------------------------------------------------------

The words, "Stupid Bitch" Kept echoing in her mind

like a pendulum that swung back and forth.

She knew that they were just words, but somehow

they were words that echoed in her mind, heart and soul

for a lot longer then she liked to admit, even to herself.

She was a very strong full bodied woman... 

She knew that much. 

She knew that she was powerful and that words 

never hurt her.

But she also knew that she could be very prideful

and self sabotaging all at the same time.

And as she went back in her mind to the day 

that those words were spoken to her... 

She remembered exactly why they were said. 

As she tried to put it together for herself, 

once and for all, 

so that she could either

A) pack it up and ship it out..

Or

B) burn it up and let the wind take it where it belonged...

She reminded herself that most definitely 

This was not about accepting bad behavior. 

This was not about letting someone off the hook.

and most definitely that this was not about 

Blaming herself for what had occurred that day.

However, she knew that forgiveness was necessary not only 

from God and herself, but also for him.  

and with that... She knew she would be off the hook, 

so she could move forward.  

 So she took in a deep breath and she allowed her mind 

to really open up...

It was a Saturday Night... 

There was a Full Moon in the making... 

A Pisces Full Moon at that. 

Which of course represented Endings... 

And there she was, walking her life down a drain. 

okay, swimming down was more like it because she had 

become so addicted to alcohol 

and just washing down 

every emotion and feeling that ever tried to come up in her that   

she was definitely coming up to an ending of some sort for sure.

That night, her and her man had just went out and 

tried to watch an event together and even though it had 

ended in success, the rest of their night together did 

not match that same level of success. 

She had failed. 

Big time. 

The one thing she was supposed to learn in this life

was how to not give over her power and that night she 

failed. 

She realized now, two months later, 

and countless queen-ology lessons on 

femininity malfunction

that she had re-lived her karmic repeat yet again... 

Only this time, Her karmic partner was what she realized 

was also her key. 

But this is where she had to decide to be truthful..

With herself, with the universe, and even him,

 if he should ever care to know.

But she knew that was on him, not her. She didn't chase.

She knew her role. 

But as a queen, she also knew that being totally

 transparent and authentic was the only way to go.

And so she was going to be just that. 

She learned one fight too late that communication was the 

foundation for a relationship. 

And now that she was back to square one... 

She accepted her regrets... 

And she forgave herself for not knowing that 

she should have had enough self respect for herself

 to care about how she always felt in the now moments.

And she forgave herself for not being confident enough to share 

her feelings and emotions with someone she really did love and care about.

Only it didn't show because she knew very well that 

When a person couldn't love themselves, 

then they very well couldn't share love with another either. 

And this is what she had to face in herself. 

So she wrote it in her heart and

folded it up... 

And she gave it over to God. 

Just like that. 

Truthful Eclipse

 The Sun came and went as the wind blew hard 

enough to blow it out. 

But every time the sun went out, he came right back 

because he knew it would take a lot more then the wind

to take him out for good. 

And it was definitely no secret. 

It was never hidden. 

And the truth was about to be brought forth for all to see

and feel on this spectacular day of the 

Taurus Full Moon Total Lunar Eclipse! 

She really wasn't anticipating it,

 but that was actually not true to a T, to say the least.

 It was more like half the truth...

She sat in her favorite chair with her headset on, 

just listening to all her old favorites on youtube.

Each 80's song took her back in time to when she was 

just flowing with life, not because of expectations 

that needed to be met, but just flowing with life 

because of the things that excited her. 

Everything that came up in front of her in 

each now moment, even if it scared her at first,

 because she didn't know what it was, or what it promised. 

Good or bad, joy or pain...

As a youngster, she always had the wild heart

and desire to explore all that ever crossed her path 

knowing that she was always going to be okay.

And today, 

She sat in her favorite chair listening to all these 

wonderful songs that took her soul back to that

exciting feeling, passion, and desire within her.

And she was tempted to begin exploring again.

Only this time, she had learned that her safety was 

in God's hands and not out side of herself in the 

hands, ideas, and expectations of others. 

Unchained Potential

After taking the bite from the poisoned apple...

The Princess dropped to the ground...

And fell into a deep sleep... 

She went into the underworld while in this deep sleep. 

It was nothing but a nightmare to say the least.

But what she didn't realize, is that there was no need 

for a Prince to come rescue her with a kiss. 

Of course this is what she had been told 

by the very witch that gave her the poisoned apple.

But it couldn't be more farther from the truth then 

it really truly revealed itself to be.

44 years later, she finally stopped long enough to see 

the truth.

The truth that all she had to do to wake up, 

was turn back to God. 

Her one true creator. 

And realize that he made her of ultimate value. 

And the only reason the wicked witch 

ever came to her with the poisoned fruit

was in deed because she had unresolved 

pain, shame, and bitterness from her own self destruction

that she didn't realize was up to her own relationship

with God and her self to heal.

The truth of this fairy tale that lives

 on and on 

life time after life time

generation after generation 

is the very fact that it was a curse. 

There was a group of men who wanted to take over God's place.

They wanted the world to see them as God

so that they could control the world to their benefit. 

And so the Perverted Toxic Male Society was created.

The ego works in this same way. 

And she realized that she had imprisoned herself 

with her own Perverted Toxic Masculine mindset

that drove her to rule over her own feminine reality!

In order to make earthly sense of this revelation 

that she had just revealed in herself, 

she was going to have to tell her story. 

Her testimony...

She had allowed herself to believe the lie

 that a woman's only value was in her Body;

 Lips, hips, and tips,

 as well as;

 in the sexual advantage she had over men 

who didn't even deserve her, 

 by holding onto 'the cookie'!

Unfortunately, that was actually a very shallow and carnal way 

of living and she knew it never excited her. 

That's why she made a game of it. 

But what she didn't realize was, this is exactly 

what they wanted. 

And by biting the apple, it took her down..

Into a deep sleep where she entered into  

the underworld. 

And that's where she 

hit rock bottom. 

At Rock bottom, she met her reflection..

The devil!

And when she took a turn dancing with the devil,

it was only then that she realized that she had turned from God.

 

Not realizing that by misunderstanding God's word 

and applying his words to her life in only a masculine mindset way,

was indeed the road away from God. 

Putting God on the cross was the poisoned fruit. 

The curse. 

The sin. 

And so in life, by putting God outside of herself, 

Only brought her closer to the devil, 

One step 

one day

one minute 

at a time. 

She realized she had put God into an image. 

A book called the bible. 

Churches.

Religion.

Even Positive and Negative Energy. 

So if something appeared wrong, she would judge and say

that's the devil, or that's evil.

But then when that same wrong came back around and it worked for others,

then she would be confused as to what was good and what was God.. 

And this is why she took the bite of the poisoned apple.

The confusion and wanting to know but also not to know too much. 

Was the key to the Toxic Perverted Masculine Culture.

So when she was in the underworld, 

dancing with the devil, 

she learned that God was the creator of both and all.

For her to be dancing with the devil 

meant that she was also of the devil but also of God. 

And the choice was up to her to decide

if she wanted to stay asleep and twirling downward...

But of course, couldn't go down any further then she already was, 

since she was dancing with the devil...

Or she could wake up to the fact that God was in her. 

In the very cells that made her.

And that who she was mattered. 

And she had a role. 

She had more value then she allowed herself to believe. 

It only took returning to the light,

 to God,

 and to begin to research with an open mind and heart the truth 

of who she truly was in God her creator.

And this was the true awakening of the deep sleep she had fallen under.

Because the true awakening of a Queen never came from the Kiss of Death!